dear jade

Hello Jade,
You asked how i could have these feelings, that you haven't earned? I have two answers. One is that, in my experience, people almost never get what they deserve. People who deserve scorn often get many chances at love, and people who deserve beautiful loving often never find it. We're all too locked inside our brains, slaves to insecurity and fear and biological drives that push us one way or another simply because of the way somebody smells. Usually when something wonderful happens, that's just the way it is, and we didn't earn it. When sadness claims us, we didn't earn that either. The trick is to try to be open to love, and not trip over our own feet when it finds us (for the record, everybody trips).
My other answer to what you have or haven't earned, is that my reaction to you is on the level of spirit reaching out into the universe to try to touch your vibration, and that we still know almost nothing about our personality compatibility. Despite the fact that our spirits have set off resonances, we may not be peas in a pod at all. Every person has their own accumulation of brain input which results in a unique personality, and even on our best spiritual day we can only escape our "selves" so far. You and i have a lifetime's worth of biases, affinities, habits, perceptions, fears, humor, and general rhythms which may mesh wonderfully, or not. Something else your letter told me, which i hadn't realized, is that you feel a little insecurity. All i know is that the spirit part of me tells me to be wide open to you, and that insecurities are just one of a million things you'll never need with me.
hugs,
wrob