"Orange is the New Black"

 2013-2019

-created by jenji kohan

If you don't mind well-intended, semi-idiotic escapism, this might charm you. Great performances and competent writing are the hallmarks of this drama about life in womyn's prison. There are also positive marks for gay/trans portrayals, plus a somewhat nuanced take on the "me too" era. On the down side, it's an insultingly facile portrayal of the mindfucking horror that is prison life. It's barely more than a Hallmark card, in that regard. Any prison show that doesn't make you want to scream out of the house to tear down all prisons forever, has wasted its opportunity. Plus, it lasted too long...the sexy factor largely disappears in the final seasons, and without that its weaknesses are more exposed.

great balsa fire

I scan your attire
I peer into your eyes
to see what sustains you
The answer terrifies

"Star Trek: Lower Decks" (& PRODIGY)

Imagine "Sub Rosa" performed by the cast of "Up With People", hellbent on proving that a G rating can be sexy.

And PRODIGY is possibly worse. TREK made a morning animated show in the 70s that didn't talk down to its audience, but apparently we've lost that ability.

The Muppet Show, season 5

ROGER MOORE ***

Low-rent spies want to take out the guest (not in the nice way). Roger's urbane "Talk to the Animals" delivers humor and heart.

JAMES COBURN ***

Very, very good. James bonds with animal, and tries to teach him meditation.

BROOKE SHIELDS ****

Brooke walks into an episode-long telling of "Alice in Wonderland". The delight is non-stop and finishes, naturally, with "Off to See the Wizard".

TONY RANDALL **

I wanted to believe that anything with tony is good! But the inspiration just doesn't spark. Perhaps i'm cranky because piggy gets turned to stone...with no sign of ELO.

PAUL SIMON ****

The most idiot-proof episode ever. All devoted to paul's songs - even though you might make one or two different selections, it's still...perfect.

JOAN BAEZ **

Floyd does a delightful "Blackbird", and there's also a charming "Man Smart (Critters Smarter)"...which culminates in eco-terrorism (a remarkably brave choice for a show that courts a young audience).

LINDA RONSTADT ***

Perhaps the least clever Muppet episode ever...and that's a good thing. They sagaciously let linda do four songs uninterrupted. "I'm So Happy" is also a highlight.

GLENDA JACKSON ****

Glenda slips into pirate mode, and commandeers the theater-ship. This little nugget feels more like a full-blown movie than any other episode. The only four-star entry without a defining moment of brilliance (though gonzo's "Workin' at the Car Wash Blues" comes close).

LORETTA SWIT ***

Kermit fires piggy, loretta replaces her, and he's more genuinely abusive than you've ever seen him. This cruel body-shaming would never fly today.

HAL LINDEN ***

The affable, elegant hal lends his musical comedy chops as statler and waldorf take over. Hal and robin break hearts with "If We Ruled the World", plus a classic "Ob-la-di, ob-la-da".

JEAN-PIERRE RAMPAL ***

Merry Muppet mirth. Renowned flutist turns the pied piper into "Ease On Down the Road".

CAROL BURNETT ***

Carol's appearance is interrupted by an episode-long dance marathon. Her highlight is "But Not For Me", as the charwomyn.

JOHNNY CASH ***

"Dirty Old Egg-Sucking Dog", "Goodnight Sardine", "Jackson"...this one will slap a big Muppet grin on your face.

MELISSA MANCHESTER ***

Tumblin' tumbleweeds...on top of an alpine mountain

SENOR WENCES ***

Charming, as the Muppets celebrate...puppets! Veterinarian's Hospital will leave you in stitches.

DEBBIE HARRY ***

Some people, i'm not saying me, might be moved to tears by debbie's "Rainbow Connection" with kermit. Okay, me.

GENE KELLY **

Nice, but...

GLADYS KNIGHT ****

As the theater roof is taken away for repairs, not even the wrong billie holiday song can keep this one from four stars. Gladys is wonderful, and the show rises to the occasion. "Friendship Train" is particularly perfect.

WALLY BOAG ***

A thirty-year performer at Disneyworld, wally centerpieces a salute to vaudeville...and his bagpipe act makes you forgive his resume. Plus the funniest Muppet moment ever, as chef, animal, and beaker presage tonto, tarzan, and frankenstein, with their transcendent rendering of "Danny Boy".

BUDDY RICH ***

Yes folks, the drum battle for the ages! Will animal eat buddy?

MARTY FELDMAN ***

A warped wandering through the Arabian Nights, climaxed by the appearance of the Sesame Street Muppets. Marty goes eye-to-eye with cookie monster!

CHRIS LANGHAM ***

Muppet magic firing on all cylinders. Chris who? Not bad at all...plus kermit and robin palling around with whales hunting from whalers...

MAC DAVIS ***

Anticipating 3D copiers by forty years, scores of beakers are unleashed!

SHIRLEY BASSEY ***

Lovely. Guess who plays goldfinger? A bit anti-climactic for the last Muppet Show ever? Ah well, play on, play on...

"A Short History of Nearly Everything"

 -by bill bryson

2003

Bill tackles the entire history of advanced humyn scientific thought, audaciously attempting to encapsulate it all in a single volume. If you ever have a friend who loses their sight for a week or two, and needs the best distraction imaginable, you'll never find a more perfect book to read them, than this one here.

phlegmatic

A naked monkey upright walks
Mother nature a lugie hocks

a void dance

People avoid me, tragic but true
People avoid me, how about you?
The tragedy they fail to see
How much better they'd be with me
Legendary lovers go unlaid
Selfless souls get the blade
Genius gurus, no attention paid
That is how the game is played

central casting

If you want a stud
from central casting
walk right by
I ain't your guy

If you want prince charming
Suave and disarming
Don't look at me
I sure ain't he

If you want a copy
A prefab poppy
Bossing and blowing
Keep on going

If you want a lover
who's like no other
If that doesn't cause you fear
If science and sensibility are your "sign"
If you don't come pre-defined
Then open your eyes, i'm here

beast man

You make the beast in me rise
Longing to consume and control
Burning to brand your body
Yearning to hold your soul

I've learned how to keep him at bay
but we're all so broken and needy
In life i'm solicitous, so non-duplicitous
but your shining eyes make him greedy

He plots your endorphin overdose
so you'll care evermore for ME
He longs for you at long last to live
your life's crowning carnality

Ten times, a hundred times
A thousand times, more
Swim in my healing harbor
Pull yourself onto my shore

weed

This story begins some
forty thousand years ago
A timely, tragic tale
of wonderment and woe

Excavating the extinction trail
of the bones found in rocks
shows global warming's just the nail
sealing up life's death box

We started hunting
The megafauna soon gone
No more saber-tooth, moa
or mammoth mastadon

Whales, gorillas, rhinos
did their best to hold on
Pachyderms and hippos
going, going, gone

We are the weed
See how we breed
Slash and burn greed
Apocalypse seed

Tromping boots trail stowaways
to each corner of the globe
Behold bat and frog genocides
from an invasive microbe

And what about the death
of all the world's coral?
Take peek in the mirror
if you would seek a moral

But will the plants survive?
It's not just the truffula tree
Shall simmering segmentation
sever all the green we see?

...except for one weed
Apocalypse seed
Feel how we breed
slash and burn greed

Where then the terminus
of this treachery and travail?
Will rats or ruminococcus
be the only ones to prevail?
Is it too late to extricate
our hands from the third rail?
Or will a tailless primate
be the end of life's tale?

beaker boy

Funniest...muppet...moment...ever.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ULB_QisXSbs