naked nurse 2

SOOTHING OUR SOCIAL/SPIRITUAL/SEXUAL STRIFE

Dear naked nurse,
A colleague was defending the belief in god, and said that humans have always believed, so the urge to seek higher meaning must be human nature. Can she be right?
frustrated in fresno

Dear frustrated,
Well...she's partly right. But only technically! Her grasp on human nature is comparable to a gibbon's grasp on geometry. As best we can tell (which ain't yet all that well), ancient pre-agricultural societies (or 99% of human history) seem to have generally had some sort of supernatural belief system. But to equate those beliefs with modern conceptions of god is hellaciously misleading. Their gods were more distant than modern ones, who are in our back pockets, up in our grills, and all over our bedrooms (horny buggers!). Ancient gods were more benign - no roasting in hell, reward in heaven, or revelation. They were probably treated more as story than substance - like santa claus, or henry hudson making thunder by bowling ninepins in the sky. God is a concept by which we measure our pain, and humanity is in an epoch of horrifically perverse self-loathing, but to propose that we've always been caught up in existential angst or obsessed by a world other than the one around us, is to project post-agricultural mass misery where it doesn't belong - all data points to the likelihood that ancient humans were happier, healthier, peaceful, well-fed and well-loved (oh my my, were they well-loved).
So throw these perspectives into your ongoing debate...but don't get your hopes up. For do you know who creates an invisible rabbit?
Someone who needs an invisible rabbit.
perspicacious ponderings,
the naked nurse

Send queries to nakednursing@yahoo.com!

sun of jeffer

Buddha would sigh if buddhism he did spy
JC would flee from christianity
Marx would hurl to see the "communist" world
Jefferson would cry to see the U.S. of I

naked nurse

SOOTHING OUR SOCIAL/SPIRITUAL/SEXUAL STRIFE

Dear naked nurse,
My friend says that the best sex is about spiritual connection. I say physical chemistry. Who's right??
horny in Harrisburg

Dear horny,
You're both wrong! Your friend is flirting with a heap of disappointment, hoping for great sex with a spiritual soul mate. If the physical chemistry isn't there, no amount of adoration or devotion will make us anything but sad in the sack.
But you're mistaken too.
Oh sure, the kind of instant attraction that makes hair stand on end can make for a delirious romp. There might even be an orgasm or two before you get your clothes off! Tallywacker-ho!
But.
Counter-intuitively...
If the game you're playing is "best sex of your life", start by finding someone with whom you're mildly/moderately attracted. Someone you can take or leave. Someone you'd give a tumble if they're not a blathering idiot, and you haven't had a shag since summer. Someone who makes you say, "Well, that was pretty nice", during the initial post-coital cuddle.
The reason moderately-exciting attraction can equal sex for the ages is this - it ain't over in the time it takes to read this sentence. Hair-on-end attraction is nature's way of saying "get to the baby-making NOW". If you want the healthiest baby, seek out someone who makes your knees knock (and inversely, if you want some immunologically-deficient half-wit, trying forcing a pregnancy when nature ain't interested). Yes, nature wants babies...but doesn't care about the quality of your lovemaking. Knee-knocking attraction can make both participants BOOM automatically. For a woman, there's nothing bad about that...except when she's suddenly holding a male who's ready for naptime. With moderate attraction, it's easier for the male to hold off that boom, and settle into some lovemaking that lasts ten minutes...twenty minutes...an hour or two. Then, if you happen to actually like this person, the formula of 90-minute penetrations + spiritual bonding =
Best sex ever.
The kind where space and time melt.
The kind where your mind disappears.
The happiest and healthiest thing this broken world has to offer.
merry mistletoeing,
the naked nurse

P.S. Another benefit of moderately-attracted canoodling is that you can sometimes get away with playing a little fast and loose with contraception. Which can also be a factor in the "best sex" game.

Send queries to nakednursing@yahoo.com!

jettisonset

Romance, finance
What's in it for me?
The balance tips
I jettison thee

braivary

Talk to your ovaries
Your ovaries are you
You and they are one
You are not two
It's not your brain that sees thoughts
You're a walking plurality
You don't "have" organs, you are them
Without them, "you" wouldn't be
They are you
You are they
We are we

Talk to this cock
as it moves in you
This cock is me
(but you are cock too)
Do you use a mental ledger
to calculate when to screw?
Or is your secret language
just something this cock knew?
I am cock
Cock are we
Cock are you

Croon to your cunt!
Pamper, pleasure, please it
For this world won't love your cunt
(not one little tiny bit)
This world will punish you
if you listen to your snatch
But your body is much smarter
than that noggin you scratch
Pleasure and pee
A cunty song
Cunts are we

Talk to the babies
You don't need the pill
When body and brain are one
You can impregnate or not at will
When your body says fuck
it's far smarter than your mind
The healthiest babies are made
when we leave our brains behind
We are babies
Babies we be
Babies are we

Talk to the world
The healing's begun
A new song swells
The human race not yet run
Repressed and afraid
We control and manipulate
Torturing others and ourselves
Nature within and out we eviscerate
This world shall see
The world to be
The world are we

Talk to the stars
Walk to a new day
This garden shall be tended
with tenderness and play
And as our carnal crescendo
casts a timeless sheen
fall into dreams safe and silly
for tomorrow is not yet seen
I am you
You are me
We are we

beelzebubbling

Lucifer looked down
from his heavenly seat
seeking hapless humans
on which to apply heat
He spotted two spirits
Arranged for them to meet
A sweet lass, a gentle lad
He began to saliveet

He knew nature's perfect chemistry
'tween earth-daughter and earth-son
might happen twice in a life
(though often happens none)
He could see the starburst
about to ignite
He could see the ecstasy
about to alight
"A simple hug will make them drunk!
'Twill bring them to their knees
And when in love they intertwine
minutes become eternities

But he doesn't believe in god!
She's a bible-thumper extreme
Now THAT's entertainment!
Perversity, of thee i dream...
They won't know what to do
Their minds will unhinge!
To feel exquisite longing
for one who make you cringe?

But wait...he didn't run
He's offering marriage and babies?
He scorns those institutions!
Possessiveness is his rabies!
Yet he knows what they might have
is beyond sacred and rare
For the communion of their blood
such foolishness he'll dare?

Oh, you sweet sap
You poor, innocent lamb
To see the stacked deck
and not give a bloody damn?
But surely she'll not rise
to his idiot's state of grace
She's a captive of her mind
She'll never step outside her place!
Oh yessss, watch them squirm
She thinks that he's insane
And she'll go to her death
a prisoner of her brain"

kaa cried

Undressing, touching
Caressing, clutching
Petting, growing
Sweating, flowing
Moaning, gripping
Groaning, dripping
Sighing, gasping
Crying, grasping
Clenching, teasing
Wrenching, squeezing
Grinding, screaming
Binding, dreaming
Healing, bleeding
Feeling, breeding
Undulating, screwing
Ovulating, cooing
Riding, sprawling
Rising, falling
soaring, flying
roaring, dying