Monday, June 30, 2014

sanityized lyrics 5

(re-write of "1999", by prince)

I was dreamin' when i wrote this
Forgive me if it goes astray
But when i woke up this mornin'
I'd slept the century away

The sky was perfect blue
No ozone problem anywhere
And everybody's naked
Ain't nobody seems to care

'Cause they say twenty one zero zero
Party startin', no one watchin' time
So tonight i'm gonna party like it's 2099

I was dreamin' when i wrote this
No god or money anywhere
Everybody watchin' the kids
Yeah everyone knows how to share
Peace is all around us
Drums are thumpin' on the left and right
And no one's gettin' drunk
Only hypnotized by bonfirelight

They say twenty one zero zero
Party startin', no one watchin' time
So tonight we're gonna party like it's 2099

If you ain't here to get naked
Don't bother knockin' on my door
Kangaroo got a pocket
But people don't need one no more
Everybody huggin' and humpin'
We could all die any day
So if that's gonna happen
Let's dance this life away

They say twenty one zero zero
Party startin', no one watchin' time
So tonight we're gonna party like it's 2099
Twenty one zero zero
Party startin', no one watchin' time
So tonight we're gonna party like it's 2099
Don't ya want to go
Don't ya want to go

Thursday, June 19, 2014


Deserving of its place in the pantheon of television's sitcoms? Well...yes. And no. Bursting with potential its first season, it had a chemistry and balance not one sitcom in two hundred comes near. A put-upon everyman, a struggling actor, an abysmal boxer, a hopeful single parent, a dippy foreign mechanic, a drug-addled ex-hippie, and an acerbic dispatcher - perhaps the most across-the-board resonant cast of characters ever. But the show treads water for a few seasons, always just a few IQ points away from brilliant, or one cojone away from bold. Then creators james burrows, glen charles, and les charles leave, and the show becomes a shadow of its former almost-glory. The addition of the wonderful carol kane can't pull them out of the doldrums, and late season appearances by ted danson, tom hanks, penny marshall, and wallace shawn are wasted....but a "best of" marathon might delight.
-Like Father, Like Daughter (1)
A polish and effortlessness that belie a pilot episode. As elaine joins the cab company, alex reveals he has a daughter (talia balsam - HAPPY DAYS, MAD MEN) he hasn't seen in fifteen years, who is about to leave the states for school in Portugal. The gang convinces him they should all take a cab to say farewell in Miami. The meeting at the airport is poignant and unforced.
-Blind Date (1)
Alex arranges a blind date with the sweet-voiced woman (suzanne kent - PEE-WEE'S PLAYHOUSE, HISTORY OF THE WORLD: PART 1) on bobby's answering service. In person, she's obese and spitefully defensive. Can a sitcom make you both laugh and think deeply about an issue, perhaps subconsciously but for years to come? Yes.
-High School Reunion (1)
Louie dreads his approaching high school reunion, and wants revenge on his tormentors. Bobby convinces louie to let him go in his place, made up as a taller, more successful de palma. Louie agrees, but can't resist coming too. Jeff conaway is eye-poppingly brilliant.
-Memories of Cab 804 (1)
One of the most seamless pieces of ensemble work ever, on this show or any. The oldest company cab gets wrecked (by outgoing castmate randall carver, fittingly), and all the others tell their cab 804 stories. Guest starring tom selleck and mandy patinkin. Pinch me.
-Louie and the Nice Girl (2)
The vending machine woman (rhea perlman - CHEERS, KIRSTIE) falls for louie. He brags about all the sex they're having...except they're not. Wonderful chemistry. Brilliant and touching.
-Fantasy Borough, pt. 2 (2)
Sparked by an herve villachaize appearance in the middling pt. 1, the crew share their fantasies. You'll be smiling and chuckling non-stop, as louie dreams of being the only rich person in the world (and firing lassie), elaine & co. perform "The Lullaby of Broadway", and even alex's romantic fantasies go very wrong. Guest starring a sizzling priscilla barnes (THREE'S COMPANY, MALLRATS).
-Tony's Sister and Jim (3)
Jim romances tony's sister (julie kavner - RHODA, THE SIMPSONS). Tony is appalled. It sounds groaningly cliched - and it is. Yet the comedic talents of lloyd, kavner, and yes danza, make this one a non-stop laugher.
-On the Job, pt. 2 (3)
The Sunshine Cab Co. goes out of business. Again part 1 is middling, but 2 sparkles. Bobby works children's parties as a six-foot bunny, and alex is woeful as a night watchman. With a charming guest turn by al lewis (THE MUNSTERS, CAR 54, WHERE ARE YOU?).
-I Wanna Be Around (4)
Louie creates an armageddon shelter, and invites elaine, jeff, and tony to be his fellow survivors. Their two-day drill survives only eleven minutes. One of the few episodes to humanize louie, and give a substantive role to j. alan thomas, the actor always behind louie in the cage (and a fine fellow to be featured, as his name has the proper syllabalization to join "marilu henner" and "danny devito" in the lyricized version of the theme music).
-The Wedding of Latka and Simka (4)
Not as funny as other greatest entries, but charming and delightful for giving perhaps the most honest, progressive wedding (if you'll pardon the contradiction in terms) in sitcom history. Its quirks are explained by its being from latka's "backward" country...but don't let that fool you. The bride is given a REALISTIC admonition of what to expect, the couple wear each other's clothes for the ceremony, and defiance of authority is the test they must pass to be wed. Plus a lil' Dr. joyce brothers.

Monday, June 9, 2014

Rebirth! Of a blog!

(a semi-sequel to
I sit here on a beautiful 90-degree day, in my thoreau-sized home on this little Gulf of Mexico island. I'm not in a meadow, but i'm plenty naked. My door is open. In a nod to the detail-richness with which the previous incarnation of this site was based, the only sounds i hear are the peepings and rustlings of the birds and breeze, a neighbor's air conditioner some thirty feet away, and "Wrapped Around Your Finger" coming from cottages across the canal. The only garment within reach is boxer shorts, which i use to dab post-masturbation drippy-dick. Do post-sex cocks drip more when you don't ejaculate? I'm not positive, but i think so.
I say "nod" to such details, because i've evolved away from personal revelation in my writing. I'm still dedicated to being naked as ever, but there's more focus on enlightenment and entertainment. Let's assume that the person most fascinated by "me" in this world is me. If it's possible for ME to be occasionally bored by me (which it is), i'll assume that humanity isn't holding its breath waiting for details of my toenail infection.
Second nail from the right. In case you were wondering.
Here we the naked meadow!
Why are we here?
To find our freedom, and lose our fear.
Why did we leave "unboughtsoul"? It's a happy parting - there's no love lost with the name and spirit into which i poured my life for half a decade. This change has been coming for a while, though. There's an inescapably negative quality to the prefix "un". Negativity, even righteous negativity, is burdensome. Pure positivity, more liberating.
The black background of the former site? Also heavy. This new one is the color of kermit, and my favorite hue, sky blue.
And as poetic as "unboughtsoul" was, it didn't trip off the tongue. It's a strange construction, and just a little cumbersome. I also never liked the religious association of "soul".
And that aforementioned ME focus...unboughtsoul was about drawing a line in the sand, and while i wish such line-drawing for everyone, the language inevitably drew attention to my own life. In the less-me spirit, i'm also removing some of my photos. Do i lack the courage of my convictions, in not removing ALL such, so as to eliminate any possibility of someone liking (or disliking) this site just because of my looks? Possibly...but there are some things you just don't do, and not sharing a picture of oneself with shatner is at the top of that list.
My first choice for the new site was "nakedfreedom". A clarion call! "Naked" was a given...metaphorically or literally, there's no more beautiful word in the English language. But that site name? Taken! "Nakedfree" was available...but i quickly realized there were some undesirable connotations there. I tossed around other options, including "freedomnaked", but the beauty of "naked meadow" won me over. The words are almost musical. I heard a soft bell inside my head, pondering them for the first time. In the confluence of language and culture at this moment in history, naked meadow resonates. It sounds like a place you've never been, but have been looking for all your life. Everything that was ever happy, everything that was ever free...
Plus, it's ever so faintly sexy. Not so much that the forces of puritanism will ban me "site" unseen, but...gently and quietly, naked meadow is a place where all dreams, carnal and otherwise, become real.
On top of all that, there was a possible "truth in advertising" conflict coming down the road. Unboughtsoul was a promise of purity, a vow to be untainted by money. No advertisers monitoring content, no editors pressuring me to "tone it down". I even tried to avoid knowledge of my "hits" numbers, so as to escape being encouraged or discouraged by anything other than my naked truth. However, i may be fast approaching a time when i'll be offered money for my words. If not the words themselves, then for public speaking. Without automatically compromising my integrity, i'm preparing myself to accept such rewards. Perhaps it's a coward's way out, but we live in a world of unchecked brutality. I've lived too close to the edge (and seen how unfeeling we are to those who fall off) to be thrilled having no buffer between myself and the destitution that spares so few. Even if that buffer is little more than a fool's illusion. If my vision and creativity can bring me some amount of creature comfort, while still maintaining integrity...
I'll probably do it.
I know how obvious a choice that seems to most. But think deeply, and your mind might take a different turn.
My eyes are open to the possible corruptions. And mere world-weariness wouldn't be quite enough to make me sell myself - there also has to be a potentially stunning upside. The dark tone of the previous paragraphs notwithstanding, i've now taken my first baby steps into the world of original material public speaking.
Flashes of brilliance and absolute beauty. Out of the thousand-some unboughtsoul posts, are there a few dozen capable of making strangers laugh, get misty-eyed, or think about things they never thunk before?
The early answer seems to be yes, in ways both expected and not.
Can i avoid the pitfalls of "Like me, please like me??", or "give 'em what they like"? Can anyone, other than a pure hermit? Probably not. But i'll bust my ass trying.
So we step into a naked meadow! And "nakedfreedom" becomes the road untraveled. It would have been a more overtly revolutionary road, but it also would have carried more burden of challenge for the reader - "Am i being free enough? Oh lawsy, am i being NAKED enough??" Naked meadow is more peaceful and accepting. Which invokes the question, what's my focus - lighting a fire under the world's ass, or making people feel understood and comforted? That split is probably as fifty-fifty as it gets. Healer. Revolutionary. Perhaps there's some providence in "nakedfreedom" being unavailable. As much as i want every human to achieve my level of uninhibited self-awareness, i know we're at least a century or two away. So in the meantime, perhaps the greater part of my gift should be making people feel hopeful. Or failing that, maybe just offering permission to laugh in the face of a world that's not one tiny bit funny.
So come.
Walk through the woods.
Just when the forest seems most deep and dark...guess what you'll find.
Leave those clothes behind.
You don't need them. You never did.