Monday, July 7, 2008

why i should father your children

PHYSIQUE
At 5'10" and 130 pounds, i'm lighter and stronger than average. My body fat has always been around 2%, and at my most recent physical the doctor said i had a body mass index he had only observed in professional athletes. I've biked 35 miles in 100 degrees, can do 100 push-ups and 20 pull-ups, and have played volleyball for seven hours straight.
INTELLIGENCE
My I.Q. is 152. I was too free-spirited to be a scholastic achiever early on, but graduated summa cum laude with an M.A. in philosophy.
GENETICS
I've had almost no cavities or broken bones, no diseases save chicken pox, and almost no allergies. I've had one hospitalization for a concussion. I have an arachnoid brain cyst, which the doctor says is of no concern and has probably been there since childhood. My grandparents all lived average lifespans or longer. There is obesity on my mother's side, but that's from bad habits. There has been no mental disease in my grandparents or nuclear family. My hearing is perfect, and my eyesight is 20/40 with one color band missing. I'm blood type O negative, the universal donor.
PERSONALITY
I've never struck another human in anger (except my bullying older sister when i was nine). I don't smoke or do recreational drugs, alcohol included. I'm a nurturer. I've never had a one-night stand, and have averaged one lover every three years. I'm tactile (massage training) and comfortable with my body (nudist). I'm a pacifist, vegan, non-materialist humanist. I have a non-addictive, non-obsessive personality. I'm almost sociopathically honest. Children and non-humyn animals like me. I've written two books, and many hundreds of poems and essays. I've acted in ninety plays, directed fifteen, written ten, and founded two theater companies. I'm an extrovert and a lone wolf. I excel in activities requiring patience. In a house of wimyn, i've been the clean one. I exhibit alpha characteristics, but am a listener and watcher who gives the spotlight to others. People confide in me. I empathize with most types, having been the baby child, the first son, and the middle child. I am at once profoundly responsible and uncommonly easygoing.

Females of exceptionality, please initiate your respective interview processes...

1 comment:

The Actors said...

I am type O Negative blood, too. I never knew that about you.
The next time I decide to have a baby, I will require some type of document like the one here.
love
Amanda