I'm going to start a magazine devoted to health and self-image issues for testicles. I'm calling it The Gonadvocate.
My diatribes against makeup are sometimes met with scorn by third-wave feminists who say they've reclaimed makeup in the name of personal expression, sometimes wearing it in ways not approved by the patriarchy. To that i say, IF you're not deluding yourself, that's brilliant! But how is your choice affecting the vast majority of wimyn who are less self-actualized? Are you burying them deeper in double standards and financial chains?
The only sensible time to commit a crime is during the fall daylight savings time shift, when there are two 12:42AMs. But officer, i CLEARLY have an alibi for 12:42!
Is there anyone who would be bothered if we made one final half hour shift, then never worry about this daylight savings nonsense again?
Show me the Hollywood director brave enough to do a remake of "The Wizard of Oz", and switch the actors playing the good witch and wicked witch.
I think the other states missed the boat in not following Indiana's lead in capital-naming - Iowapolis in particular, would easily become the tourist mecca of the Midwest. Iawopolis.
If wishes were horses...there would instantly be billions more creatures enslaved and abused.
A slave nation was once founded on the precept "all men are created equal". Yet there's a more subtle contradiction at play. We declared our independence as a protest against being economically exploited...yet we created an economy in which economic exploitation of our own citizens is the most essential and inescapable building block.
If ben franklin had gotten his way and our national bird was the turkey, would we have a national day of gratitude on which we eat an eagle?
The closer you get to sanity, the more likely you'll go insane.
Attention Hollywood! I've got your next mega-blockbuster. It's been in front of our nose the whole time - "Robin Hood vs. Millionaire Bruce Wayne".
Thursday, August 28, 2025
Sunday, August 24, 2025
Sexy Knees
wrob's music videos
A list - greatest concert ever
B list - specialty occasions
C list - oblivion
Wednesday, August 20, 2025
not-ends 44
Neil armstrong left four poops on the moon. How long do you think it will be before some ambitious astronaut sees the E-Bay goldmine just laying there?
There are two kinds of people who drink - those who like to drink, and those who like to be around people who drink.
Do you suppose neil buried the poops in moon dust, or just dropped them?
Aren't all these streets re-named for MLK rather missing the mark? Wouldn't it be more appropriate to re-name mountains?
What do fish think of air bubbles floating upward? Imagine if you were walking along, and a huge water bubble burst from the ground and floated straight up?
Anytime four or more people of the same gender gather together, critical thinking is about to get its ass kicked.
Life-Ain't-Fair dept.: Some wimyn have a period, others have an ellipsis.
I am sick and tired of martial arts schools suckering the small-minded with their pretense of "spirituality". Spirituality and ass-kicking are antithetical - end of story.
Do left-handed people have a lower sex drive? They must, else why would there be so few of them!
Sexual dysfunction is everywhere these days. I'm not exempt, i have chronic situational impotence - i can't get an erection with another person, unless that person is giving me a tarot reading. "Oh yeah, baby, ohhhh yeah...ohh who's your queen of cups, who's your queen of cups?"
There are two kinds of people who drink - those who like to drink, and those who like to be around people who drink.
Do you suppose neil buried the poops in moon dust, or just dropped them?
Aren't all these streets re-named for MLK rather missing the mark? Wouldn't it be more appropriate to re-name mountains?
What do fish think of air bubbles floating upward? Imagine if you were walking along, and a huge water bubble burst from the ground and floated straight up?
Anytime four or more people of the same gender gather together, critical thinking is about to get its ass kicked.
Life-Ain't-Fair dept.: Some wimyn have a period, others have an ellipsis.
I am sick and tired of martial arts schools suckering the small-minded with their pretense of "spirituality". Spirituality and ass-kicking are antithetical - end of story.
Do left-handed people have a lower sex drive? They must, else why would there be so few of them!
Sexual dysfunction is everywhere these days. I'm not exempt, i have chronic situational impotence - i can't get an erection with another person, unless that person is giving me a tarot reading. "Oh yeah, baby, ohhhh yeah...ohh who's your queen of cups, who's your queen of cups?"
Saturday, August 16, 2025
Hot Mama
wrob's music videos
A list - greatest concert ever
B list - specialty occasions
C list - oblivion
I sometimes dream of bringing this one back...
Saturday, August 9, 2025
not-ends 45
The fist bump - America's way of saying "I'm really not comfortable touching other people".
Ah, the broken mirror...fortunately for some, seven years' bad luck is a step in the right direction.
I have anus dermatitis. One of the recommended medical treatments is daily exposure to sunlight. May i get a doctor's note?
Which of the following video games is fake? Super Columbine Massacre!, Muslim Massacre, Custer's Revenge (in which the player dodges arrows to rape an indian tied to a cactus), Rapeplay (in which the player rapes a mother and her adolescent daughters), or Gandhi: The Salty Dog, in which the player leads protesters to the sea to make salt in defiance of colonial occupiers?
Why do we never hear astrology buffs talking about Uranus being in retrograde?
Ah, the broken mirror...fortunately for some, seven years' bad luck is a step in the right direction.
I have anus dermatitis. One of the recommended medical treatments is daily exposure to sunlight. May i get a doctor's note?
Which of the following video games is fake? Super Columbine Massacre!, Muslim Massacre, Custer's Revenge (in which the player dodges arrows to rape an indian tied to a cactus), Rapeplay (in which the player rapes a mother and her adolescent daughters), or Gandhi: The Salty Dog, in which the player leads protesters to the sea to make salt in defiance of colonial occupiers?
How can "softly used" and "hardly used" mean the same thing?
Show me someone wise in the ways of romance, and i'll show you an octogenarian.
To call alcoholism or addiction a disease, is to mangle the meaning of that term beyond recognition. There is no element of choice in cancer. Alcoholism is a behavior that gets ingrained into our synaptic pathways - the more we drink, the larger those pathways become. Pathways can be shrunk again...but to understand how hard that can be, imagine being told that you could never again listen to music. How many days, months, or years would you be able to resist? Do you imagine you would never, ever backslide?
To call alcoholism or addiction a disease, is to mangle the meaning of that term beyond recognition. There is no element of choice in cancer. Alcoholism is a behavior that gets ingrained into our synaptic pathways - the more we drink, the larger those pathways become. Pathways can be shrunk again...but to understand how hard that can be, imagine being told that you could never again listen to music. How many days, months, or years would you be able to resist? Do you imagine you would never, ever backslide?
Why do we never hear astrology buffs talking about Uranus being in retrograde?
The most impossible aspect of protecting someone, is choosing whether to protect them from themselves.
T-shirt: (front) VIRGINIA IS FOR LOVERS (back) WEST VIRGINIA IS FOR FUCKERS
The world's biggest secret? Wimyn like sex more than men. In retrospect, it's pretty obvious...
Unreliable Dongle Blues
wrob's music videos
A list - greatest concert ever
B list - specialty occasions
C list - oblivion
Monday, August 4, 2025
not-ends 35
America's leading export is culture. Here are America's four biggest businesses:
1) Manufacturing machines of death.
2) Selling socially-acceptable liquids that impair judgment and disable inhibitions.
3) Selling an invisible best friend who can do ANYTHING.
4) Selling pieces of paper that might make you instantly rich in a world where babies starve.
That squishy sound you hear may be your head shifting in your ass.
I propose a new Olympic sport - the 100-meter backward sprint.
There are a few words we feminists don't seem to be in a rush to re-brand; i haven't heard anyone talking about a henchperson, flim-flam person, fall person, or con person.
If abortion is a crime, is sex a misdemeanor?
People use the phrase "mind-numbing job" as though there are ANY psychologically healthy, day-after-day eight-hour tasks.
Using their own logic, isn't it fair to ask people who believe in an afterlife, what's after the afterlife?
There's something strange going on in the shift from the word "woman" to "women". The second syllable gets spelled differently, but pronounced the same. The first syllable doesn't change, yet gets a new pronunciation. Something fishy there...
If you think wisdom and serenity go hand in hand, you've experienced neither.
Do i have a "savior complex"? Anyone who doesn't, isn't really paying attention.
How about the backwards long jump? Or the backwards javelin? Hey, don't look at me like i'm crazy - i didn't invent the backstroke.
I hereby institute a new rule for all sexual relationships - the Freebie! When a couple break up, each partner is entitled to one sexual freebie with each other. A Freebie comes with no strings. Conversation is optional. The period in which freebies can be claimed mirrors the length of the given relationship. Thus, if a couple were together eleven months, they each have eleven months to claim their Freebie. If a couple were together for decades, you may have to honor that knock on your door when you're ninety-three (go get 'em, tiger). Dalliances of less than a month get no Freebie privileges. The Freebie must be honored no matter how the relationship ended. I considered exempting wankers from freebie rights, but if you got involved with a wanker, you have no one to blame but yourself.
1) Manufacturing machines of death.
2) Selling socially-acceptable liquids that impair judgment and disable inhibitions.
3) Selling an invisible best friend who can do ANYTHING.
4) Selling pieces of paper that might make you instantly rich in a world where babies starve.
That squishy sound you hear may be your head shifting in your ass.
I propose a new Olympic sport - the 100-meter backward sprint.
There are a few words we feminists don't seem to be in a rush to re-brand; i haven't heard anyone talking about a henchperson, flim-flam person, fall person, or con person.
People use the phrase "mind-numbing job" as though there are ANY psychologically healthy, day-after-day eight-hour tasks.
Using their own logic, isn't it fair to ask people who believe in an afterlife, what's after the afterlife?
There's something strange going on in the shift from the word "woman" to "women". The second syllable gets spelled differently, but pronounced the same. The first syllable doesn't change, yet gets a new pronunciation. Something fishy there...
If you think wisdom and serenity go hand in hand, you've experienced neither.
Do i have a "savior complex"? Anyone who doesn't, isn't really paying attention.
How about the backwards long jump? Or the backwards javelin? Hey, don't look at me like i'm crazy - i didn't invent the backstroke.
I hereby institute a new rule for all sexual relationships - the Freebie! When a couple break up, each partner is entitled to one sexual freebie with each other. A Freebie comes with no strings. Conversation is optional. The period in which freebies can be claimed mirrors the length of the given relationship. Thus, if a couple were together eleven months, they each have eleven months to claim their Freebie. If a couple were together for decades, you may have to honor that knock on your door when you're ninety-three (go get 'em, tiger). Dalliances of less than a month get no Freebie privileges. The Freebie must be honored no matter how the relationship ended. I considered exempting wankers from freebie rights, but if you got involved with a wanker, you have no one to blame but yourself.
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)