Never Take an Old Man

(irish folk song, with new lyrics)

An old man come courting me, fa la la loodle

An old man come courting me, highderry down
An old man come courting me, said he would care for me
Oh maids when you're young never take an old man

For he has no faloodle fa la la la loodle
He has no faloodle, a diddle a one
He has no faloodle, he's lost his ding-doodle
So maids when you're young never take an old man

We went to the park, fa la la loodle
He said he felt woody, highderry down
He took me behind a tree, there was no wood to see
So maids when you're young never take an old man

Then when we went to bed, fa la la loodle
Then when we went to bed, highderry down
Then when we went to bed, the old thing it lay there dead
Oh maids when you're young never take an old man

So I threw me leg over him, fa la la loodle
I threw me leg over him, highderry down
I threw me leg over him, he said i would smother him
Oh maids when you're young never take an old man

When he went fast asleep, fa la la loodle
When he went fast asleep, highderry down
When he went fast asleep, out of bed i did creep
into the arms of a foolish young man

And i found his faloodle, fa la la la loodle
I found his faloodle, oh highderry down
His fa la la loodle was a quick-shot ding-doodle
So maids of any age, who the hell needs a man