punk sure!

(a guide for the minimally impaled)

puncture wound n. - A flesh tear deeper than it is wide.

Puncture wounds are rare (at least for those of us who haven't experienced war, prison, or mosh pit). Have YOU had one? In "comfortable" circles, maybe one in ten have.
A puncture wound on the bottom of the foot? Even more rare. Maybe one in a hundred will experience such. In the six months i've been healing just such a wound, i've only met one person who's been in my, er, feet.
On the off-chance you ever do experience one, here's what you're in for.
My wound came compliments of a 9-cm, upturned atlantic fig snail (a conch-y creature that lives inside a conspicuously rounded shell). Why this snail was lying on the bottom of the Gulf of Mexico in 2.5 feet of water with its point sticking straight up, is a mystery. How did it even GET into that position? And doesn't it know it's supposed to be in the Atlantic?? But there it was, just waiting for my grownup human weight to step onto its tip.
It entered my heel. Even in the greenish, non-transparent waters of the Gulf, i knew immediately that something undesirable had happened. I was cut...i did not expect, however, that there would be an animal protruding from my body when i pulled my foot out of the water. If that doesn't sound impressive, it should - for a tiny creature, they cram a lot of weight inside those shells. But there it was, its point impaled in my heel. I pulled it out, and dropped it. I hobbled home and let the wound gently bleed for a few hours, thinking that would cleanse the gash. I knew the puncture was deep, but the shell had come out cleanly. The only concern was infection...do the Gulf waters feel as clean as they did before the BP oil spill? No, they do not. Two days later, a friend recommended epsom salt immersions, to draw out any infection. This friend had had an infected foot puncture. His entire leg turned red and swelled, one of the most painful experiences of his life.
I epsomed twice a day for a week.
No infection.
And so began my hobbled days. The wound was in the shape of a horseshoe, nearly as wide (1cm) as i estimated its depth to be. The epsom dissolved the red scabby material that had filled the wound those first two days. It felt fine, as long as i put no pressure on it. In other words, no walking for a while.
Or six months, as it turned out. 1/150th of a human life.
I could walk, actually, as long as my heel didn't touch the ground. For a month or so, i walked on my left toes, then i realized my muscles wouldn't benefit from further prolonged off-balance treatment, so i began walking toes-only on both feet. On those occasions when my bad heel accidentally touched ground, the pain was electrifying.
There is no quick heal for any puncture wound, but this must be most true of a heel wound. No other part of the body supports so much weight, so less load-bearing areas probably return to fairly normal use more quickly.
If you're healing a foot puncture, bring lots of patience. And be prepared for EVERYONE to suggest that the protracted heal time means that some fragment of the invading body must have broken off inside you, from whence it will need to be surgically removed. You may even start to believe it yourself...finger probes may suggest something buried. But have faith in your body-awareness. You were there the moment the invading implement was removed - if it never occurred to you that something was left behind, there's a good chance there wasn't.
Just relax, and heal.
After about four months, you'll be able to walk normally, in well-soled shoes. Normalish, anyway.
Two months later, i've returned to the beach for sunsets and a swim.
Did i mention i left my aqua socks at home the day of the puncture? Did i mention we should never do that?