bracelets leftovers

(a follow-up to http://nakedmeadow.blogspot.com/2014/05/the-grey-bracelets.html)

Often when i write a piece i have public reading hopes for, there are ideas or anecdotes that get cut, in the service of making it more succinct. A few such for "grey bracelets"...
The part about being less interested in non-nude movies goes deeper than sexual deprivation. As my mind ever absorbs the bigger picture of human existence and just how barbaric we've become, i grow less and less interested in our provincial fables and parables. You want me to sit through some Hollywood commercial for the status quo? Yeah? Well, STAR WARS was pretty morally degraded even before Disney got their slimy paws on it, so thanks, but i'll probably pass. Just show me some titties.
Another factor in my psyche is that i recently endured a relationship i'd devoted years to, and received far less love in return than others who showed far less kindness and selflessness. I know, i know...you can't let one relationship affect your outlook. But it's an unfortunate swirl to add to no physical intimacy for over a year, fading youth (which in a healthy society would be an honor, not an indignity), and a relentless emotional awareness of how horribly we all treat each other.
Has unfucked loneliness made me as reckless as i feel? That woman i met the other day, the one who drinks and smokes and offers no obvious compatibility, is also a single mother. In my fantasies, i'm having unprotected sex with her tonight and tomorrow morning and afternoon and four times next Tuesday, and maybe she gets pregnant. Maybe a part of me wants that...the allure of children to hold every day and a woman to put my penis in every night. Never mind whether it's right for me (or them).
There's also a friend i have in China to whom i've playfully suggested i'm her ticket to being a U.S. citizen, and getting around that one-child policy.
Would i actually do these things? I do not know. But there is an ever-growing sense of danger in me...for myself, and maybe even others.
Degraded degraded degraded...
But that's how it works - if we lived in a society that had any kind of healthy understanding of sex or children's needs, monogamous two-parent homes would disappear overnight. The economics of our society are based on the single-family unit. So society makes marriage the only place where you can have free sex and babies. That's a juicy, whopping carrot. Society makes babies economically desirable (though that balance is tipping precariously, which is why more and more people are saying no...and one wonders whether that's accidental). Despite the ballooning costs however, children are still the most solid old-age insurance one can get.
Money money money, just follow the money...
Plus people are realizing (if excruciatingly slowly) that marriage is not the beginning of sex, but the beginning of the end of it.