Independence to intimacy
The dance of life
Our exploring capacity
Our loving veracity
Mindless babes wrapped in arms
Sleepy child astride a grownup thigh
Naked connections forever to define
our living loving limits
The love to live
Injecting and projecting
into the greater world
The lust for love
Independence returns to intimacy
Animate meat entwined
Last name to first to none
Innocence, of time unbound
Bursting outward ever again
Tuesday, July 17, 2012
Stargate SG1, season 3
Economics and a diminishing pool of unwatched sci fi got the best of me. After originally deciding to abort viewing the middle seasons of SG1 due to a lack of excellence, i'm resuming for two reasons: the improved entertainment value of seasons 9-10, and the ridiculously cheap prices on Amazon. At first my choice seemed unwise, as the show still felt like the special olympics of sci fi, but then a funny thing started to happen.
FOUR STAR - none
NOTEWORTHY
-Point of View ***
Actual, bona fide heart...you may just have an emotional response (consider yourself warned). An alternate universe Sam and Kowalski arrive at Area 51, having transported from an Earth which has been conquered by the goa'uld, and on which Sam and O'Neill were married (though he died). They plan a mission to return and make first contact with the asgard. Tapping and Anderson's scenes aren't perfect, but good enough. Plus an unexpected moment of homicidal ruthlessness from Teal'c, as he murders his alternate, who is loyal to the goa'uld. That ain't taking care of a brother. Also, i understand the unforgiving, unflattering nature of television acting, but...it sometimes seems that the gap between Tapping and Streep is just a little wider than it ought be.
-Deadman Switch ***
Sam Jones (FLASH GORDON, 10) displays no small acting chops as a bounty hunter in this abnormally character-driven tale.
-Forever in a Day **
An okay resolution to the relationship between Daniel and Sha're (Vaitiare Bandera) which began in the movie. She deserves better, but whatever. Freeing Abydonian slaves, SG1 confronts Amaunet. As she is killing Jackson, Teal'c kills her. Daniel refuses to forgive, and resigns from the team. Visions from his slain wife tell him he must return to the stars, to find and protect her child. Another charming appearance by Eric Avari (STARGATE, DAREDEVIL) as Sha're's father.
-Past and Present ***
The most comedically-obvious "that's what we calls exposition" moment in sci fi history? But after that, it's one of the rare occurrences of actual science fiction in TV sci fi. A planet is found in a state of amnesia, with no old people. It's discovered that they've been used by a genocidal stranger (Megan Leitch), in a quest to find a youth drug. This stranger grew young with everyone else, but also lost her own memories, and now exists as their leader. She and Jackson fall for each other, then the truth is discovered.
-The Devil You Know **
Evidence that even Mr. Anderson was guilty of one of the worst sins of STARGATE acting, that of being unrealistically blase' during life and death situations. There are also times when the "dumbing down" from Anderson to O'Neill rings false.
-Foothold ***
A fine little adventure about a covert alien invasion (with body snatchers) surprisingly free of the usual SG1 weaknesses.
-Pretense ***
A charming little diversion featuring the return of Skaara (Alexis Cruz, STARGATE). Having crashed on the tollan planet, they put him on trial to sort out his plea to be freed of the goa'uld enslaving him. He arranges for SG1 to advocate on his behalf. A goa'uld lord prosecutes. Garwin Sanford (Narim) and Frida Betrani (Lya) return. The courtroom scenes are actually intelligently written.
-Urgo ***
Dom DeLuise (!) plays a holographic alien who is projected into the brains of SG1. He wants to heighten their senses, follow them around, give them subliminal suggestions, and learn...forever. He's puckishly wonderful - when he's onscreen, it's almost impossible to not smile. One more rewrite might have really juiced this one...in particular, there's no scene wherein he "suggests" amorous thoughts to one (or more) of them. But it's lovely.
-A Hundred Days ***
One of the few episodes that, if you saw it having never seen any SG1, you'd want to see more. During a mercy mission, Jack is stranded in a faraway solar system when the stargate is apparently destroyed. He and the surviving villagers rebuild. Three months later, Teal'c arrives underground at the buried stargate. Jack has fallen in love, and started a life with Laira (Michele Greene, L.A. LAW). No writing weaknesses. It reminds you of TREK's "Paradise Syndrome", where Kirk loses his memory and falls in love among pastoral, simple people. Instead of paling in comparison, seeing both episodes together might be a sweet experience.
-Shades of Grey ***
Jack steals technology from an ally, and is forcibly retired from SG1. The writers have "formulaic" locked in, but at least it's well-rendered formulaic. He gives a hard cold shoulder to all the members of the team, and the acting, even from Shanks, is up to snuff.
-New Ground ***
Pretty good. Strangely gritty. Has SG1 turned a corner?
-Maternal Instinct ***
A compelling monk (Terry Chen) whose esoteric ramblings are strangely well-written. Look for a baby-faced Aaron Douglas (BATTLESTAR GALACTICA) as a dying jaffa.
-Crystal Skull ***
Tight, adventurous...with a grand feeling that should have been more common in SG1 so far. The team finds a pyramid that dwarfs any ever encountered. A crystal skull transports Jackson out of our reality, though he can still see and hear us. He returns with the team to Earth, where they enlist the aid of the only other scientist to ever find a crystal skull (and write of being teleported)...Daniel's grandfather (Jan Rubes, WITNESS), a discredited scientist who's been in an asylum for decades. He can see Daniel, but doesn't tell the others, out of fear of being called crazy. Jan's presence is pure wonderfulness, and not just because of our warm, fuzzy memories of Eli Lapp. You be careful out there among them English.
-Nemesis ***
Okay, what's going on? They've taken my regular SG1, and replaced it with Folger's Crystals? We're still not breaking the four-star barrier, but in the last third of the season they left two-star land with style. This one's a corker...visually scrumptious, with strong dashes of menace. Jack is beamed aboard an asgard ship. Thor is dying, his vessel being taken over by a lethal new enemy - the replicators, robot bugs that know nothing but consumption and reproduction (hmmm, it's a shame i'm not a bigot, there's a great illegal alien joke in there). Teal'c and Sam beam aboard for a possible suicide mission. The stargate is sacrificed in a rescue attempt. Suddenly, SG1 is acting like a book i don't want to put down.
FOUR STAR - none
NOTEWORTHY
-Point of View ***
Actual, bona fide heart...you may just have an emotional response (consider yourself warned). An alternate universe Sam and Kowalski arrive at Area 51, having transported from an Earth which has been conquered by the goa'uld, and on which Sam and O'Neill were married (though he died). They plan a mission to return and make first contact with the asgard. Tapping and Anderson's scenes aren't perfect, but good enough. Plus an unexpected moment of homicidal ruthlessness from Teal'c, as he murders his alternate, who is loyal to the goa'uld. That ain't taking care of a brother. Also, i understand the unforgiving, unflattering nature of television acting, but...it sometimes seems that the gap between Tapping and Streep is just a little wider than it ought be.
-Deadman Switch ***
Sam Jones (FLASH GORDON, 10) displays no small acting chops as a bounty hunter in this abnormally character-driven tale.
-Forever in a Day **
An okay resolution to the relationship between Daniel and Sha're (Vaitiare Bandera) which began in the movie. She deserves better, but whatever. Freeing Abydonian slaves, SG1 confronts Amaunet. As she is killing Jackson, Teal'c kills her. Daniel refuses to forgive, and resigns from the team. Visions from his slain wife tell him he must return to the stars, to find and protect her child. Another charming appearance by Eric Avari (STARGATE, DAREDEVIL) as Sha're's father.
-Past and Present ***
The most comedically-obvious "that's what we calls exposition" moment in sci fi history? But after that, it's one of the rare occurrences of actual science fiction in TV sci fi. A planet is found in a state of amnesia, with no old people. It's discovered that they've been used by a genocidal stranger (Megan Leitch), in a quest to find a youth drug. This stranger grew young with everyone else, but also lost her own memories, and now exists as their leader. She and Jackson fall for each other, then the truth is discovered.
-The Devil You Know **
Evidence that even Mr. Anderson was guilty of one of the worst sins of STARGATE acting, that of being unrealistically blase' during life and death situations. There are also times when the "dumbing down" from Anderson to O'Neill rings false.
-Foothold ***
A fine little adventure about a covert alien invasion (with body snatchers) surprisingly free of the usual SG1 weaknesses.
-Pretense ***
A charming little diversion featuring the return of Skaara (Alexis Cruz, STARGATE). Having crashed on the tollan planet, they put him on trial to sort out his plea to be freed of the goa'uld enslaving him. He arranges for SG1 to advocate on his behalf. A goa'uld lord prosecutes. Garwin Sanford (Narim) and Frida Betrani (Lya) return. The courtroom scenes are actually intelligently written.
-Urgo ***
Dom DeLuise (!) plays a holographic alien who is projected into the brains of SG1. He wants to heighten their senses, follow them around, give them subliminal suggestions, and learn...forever. He's puckishly wonderful - when he's onscreen, it's almost impossible to not smile. One more rewrite might have really juiced this one...in particular, there's no scene wherein he "suggests" amorous thoughts to one (or more) of them. But it's lovely.
-A Hundred Days ***
One of the few episodes that, if you saw it having never seen any SG1, you'd want to see more. During a mercy mission, Jack is stranded in a faraway solar system when the stargate is apparently destroyed. He and the surviving villagers rebuild. Three months later, Teal'c arrives underground at the buried stargate. Jack has fallen in love, and started a life with Laira (Michele Greene, L.A. LAW). No writing weaknesses. It reminds you of TREK's "Paradise Syndrome", where Kirk loses his memory and falls in love among pastoral, simple people. Instead of paling in comparison, seeing both episodes together might be a sweet experience.
-Shades of Grey ***
Jack steals technology from an ally, and is forcibly retired from SG1. The writers have "formulaic" locked in, but at least it's well-rendered formulaic. He gives a hard cold shoulder to all the members of the team, and the acting, even from Shanks, is up to snuff.
-New Ground ***
Pretty good. Strangely gritty. Has SG1 turned a corner?
-Maternal Instinct ***
A compelling monk (Terry Chen) whose esoteric ramblings are strangely well-written. Look for a baby-faced Aaron Douglas (BATTLESTAR GALACTICA) as a dying jaffa.
-Crystal Skull ***
Tight, adventurous...with a grand feeling that should have been more common in SG1 so far. The team finds a pyramid that dwarfs any ever encountered. A crystal skull transports Jackson out of our reality, though he can still see and hear us. He returns with the team to Earth, where they enlist the aid of the only other scientist to ever find a crystal skull (and write of being teleported)...Daniel's grandfather (Jan Rubes, WITNESS), a discredited scientist who's been in an asylum for decades. He can see Daniel, but doesn't tell the others, out of fear of being called crazy. Jan's presence is pure wonderfulness, and not just because of our warm, fuzzy memories of Eli Lapp. You be careful out there among them English.
-Nemesis ***
Okay, what's going on? They've taken my regular SG1, and replaced it with Folger's Crystals? We're still not breaking the four-star barrier, but in the last third of the season they left two-star land with style. This one's a corker...visually scrumptious, with strong dashes of menace. Jack is beamed aboard an asgard ship. Thor is dying, his vessel being taken over by a lethal new enemy - the replicators, robot bugs that know nothing but consumption and reproduction (hmmm, it's a shame i'm not a bigot, there's a great illegal alien joke in there). Teal'c and Sam beam aboard for a possible suicide mission. The stargate is sacrificed in a rescue attempt. Suddenly, SG1 is acting like a book i don't want to put down.
Saturday, July 14, 2012
depression undressed
"Depression cannot be cured, only prevented"
-dr. jane aloysius o'mccorkleschlatt
It was my intention to drop the above one-liner into my next connection of not-ends...but to do so would move my words from being likely misunderstood to almost-certainly misunderstood. So i'll 'splain.
The sentiment cannot be taken as literally true. One person's depression can be functionally "cured", given certain circumstances, those being more or less the concerted effort of approximately ten people who are close at hand on a daily or near-daily basis, filling the life of said person with all the laughter, sex, acceptance, and physical/emotional intimacy they could desire. Beyond that, any attempt to "sort out" the person's psychological problems will generally run counter to the group's goal.
Understand what i am saying. I am calling out the psychotherapeutic community, and labeling them little more than charlatans (certain nobler intents notwithstanding). Our understanding of basic human nature is still so nascent that the bulk of our psychiatric paradigm is bogged down in ignorance and rattle-shaking. Their definition of "normal" is little more than a reflection of our society's mores. A person is "healthy" when their thoughts and actions are those of a good citizen, circa now.
I challenge us all to become used to the idea that depression is not an aberration, but the norm. Given the level of physical and emotional isolation the average person experiences, combined with the levels of fear we all live with on a daily basis, it is much more fascinating when someone shows NO signs of depression. It is those people who are more worthy of study, in terms of coping mechanisms and sublimated stress. If our understanding of human psychology is to move forward, those who have obvious trouble holding it all together must come to be viewed as the norm.
The usefulness of jane's quote is in deflecting the well-intended efforts of any of us (professional or amateur) to "fix" someone we perceive as depressed. Advice-giving is of NO use. Even when we're broken (and know it), this society's focus on self-reliance will prevent most of us from responding well to being "fixed". There are of course exceptions...in our miseries, many do give control of our lives to a "higher power". Religion or similar cults, sports teams, and celebrity fan clubs come to mind. The more literal among us skip all that and go straight to painkiller addiction. But on the personal level, deep down most of us will be offended at the thought of someone "figuring out" our lives better than ourselves. And even if we agree with the advice, even if it has merit, it still likely won't address the real roots of depression.
Put another way, the more you display signs of clinical depression, the healthier your response to this world.
Pretty impressive irony.
So save your advice. Give hugs instead, especially to those who don't want them. And let's start figuring out how to raise our children so they don't become like us.
-dr. jane aloysius o'mccorkleschlatt
It was my intention to drop the above one-liner into my next connection of not-ends...but to do so would move my words from being likely misunderstood to almost-certainly misunderstood. So i'll 'splain.
The sentiment cannot be taken as literally true. One person's depression can be functionally "cured", given certain circumstances, those being more or less the concerted effort of approximately ten people who are close at hand on a daily or near-daily basis, filling the life of said person with all the laughter, sex, acceptance, and physical/emotional intimacy they could desire. Beyond that, any attempt to "sort out" the person's psychological problems will generally run counter to the group's goal.
Understand what i am saying. I am calling out the psychotherapeutic community, and labeling them little more than charlatans (certain nobler intents notwithstanding). Our understanding of basic human nature is still so nascent that the bulk of our psychiatric paradigm is bogged down in ignorance and rattle-shaking. Their definition of "normal" is little more than a reflection of our society's mores. A person is "healthy" when their thoughts and actions are those of a good citizen, circa now.
I challenge us all to become used to the idea that depression is not an aberration, but the norm. Given the level of physical and emotional isolation the average person experiences, combined with the levels of fear we all live with on a daily basis, it is much more fascinating when someone shows NO signs of depression. It is those people who are more worthy of study, in terms of coping mechanisms and sublimated stress. If our understanding of human psychology is to move forward, those who have obvious trouble holding it all together must come to be viewed as the norm.
The usefulness of jane's quote is in deflecting the well-intended efforts of any of us (professional or amateur) to "fix" someone we perceive as depressed. Advice-giving is of NO use. Even when we're broken (and know it), this society's focus on self-reliance will prevent most of us from responding well to being "fixed". There are of course exceptions...in our miseries, many do give control of our lives to a "higher power". Religion or similar cults, sports teams, and celebrity fan clubs come to mind. The more literal among us skip all that and go straight to painkiller addiction. But on the personal level, deep down most of us will be offended at the thought of someone "figuring out" our lives better than ourselves. And even if we agree with the advice, even if it has merit, it still likely won't address the real roots of depression.
Put another way, the more you display signs of clinical depression, the healthier your response to this world.
Pretty impressive irony.
So save your advice. Give hugs instead, especially to those who don't want them. And let's start figuring out how to raise our children so they don't become like us.
Friday, July 13, 2012
"M*A*S*H"
1972-1983
FOUR-STAR EPISODES
A four-star movie begat 61 four-star episodes. No other television show comes close.
-season one: 8
-season two: 9
-season three: 11 (by this measure, the greatest single season of serial television ever)
-season four: 9
-season five: 9
-season six: 5
-season seven: 1
-season eight: 5
-season nine: 1
-season ten: 0
-season eleven: 3
PERFORMANCES (# of episodes)
Alan Alda (Benjamin Franklin Pierce, 251)
Who was the most influential creator of the most influential sitcom ever? Larry Gelbart. After that...Burt Metcalfe? Or Alan. He wrote nineteen episodes, directed thirty, and was creative consultant for one hundred thirty-one. All with nary a single Hawkeye-less entry.
HAWK-A-THON
-Yankee Doodle Doctor
-Tuttle
-Dear Dad, Again
-Adam's Ribs
-The Late Captain Pierce
-Hawkeye
-The More I See You
-Hawk's Nightmare
-Inga
-Peace on Us
-Who Knew?
-Goodbye, Farewell, and Amen
Loretta Swit (Margaret Houlihan, 237)
One of the most clearly-rendered character arcs in television history.
HOTLIPS-A-THON
-Hot Lips and Empty Arms
-The Nurses
-Margaret's Marriage
-Comrades in Arms
-Stars and Stripes
-Father's Day
Jamie Farr (Max Klinger, 211)
Early-series Klinger was classic, latter-series Klinger lovely (though occasionally forced). Who wouldn't love an actor who turned "Halt! Who goes there?" into a character for the ages? Think of how the very lifeblood of M*A*S*H would have been diminished had Klinger been portrayed swishily, as originally written?
KLINGERTHON
-Chief Surgeon Who?
-Radar's Report
-Ain't Love Grand
-Too Many Cooks
-Dear Uncle Abdul
-As Time Goes By
William Christopher (Francis Mulcahy, 210)
William created a character so sweetly and understatedly lovable, we forgot to be annoyed that he's a bible-thumper.
MULCAHYTHON
-Alcoholics Unanimous
-Movie Tonight
-Mulcahy's War
-Dear Sis
-Blood Brothers
-Heroes
Harry Morgan (Sherman Potter, 179)
Can anybody calculate how towering it is that every episode from seasons 4-11 didn't end with the viewer thinking about how much they miss Henry?
POTTERTHON
-Change of Command
-Dear Mildred
-Hawkeye Get Your Gun
-Potter's Retirement
-Pressure Points
-Old Soldiers
Mike Farrell (B.J. Hunnicutt, 178)
See the previous actor's note.
B.J.-A-THON
-Welcome to Korea
-B.J. Papa San
-Hanky Panky
-Period of Adjustment
-The Party
-Oh, How We Danced
Gary Burghoff (Radar O'Reilly, 155)
A timeless synthesis of actor and character. Can we please have W*A*L*T*E*R released on dvd? We don't mind if it sucks.
RADAR-A-THON
-Springtime
-The General's Practitioner
-Fallen Idol
-Your Hit Parade
-Lt. Radar O'Reilly
-Mail Call Three
-Hot Lips is Back in Town
-Good-Bye Radar
-The Foresight Saga
-"It Had to be You", AfterMASH
David Ogden Stiers (Charles Emerson Winchester, 131)
Back up a fresh truckload of superlatives, please.
WINCHESTERTHON
-Fade Out, Fade In
-The Winchester Tapes
-Dr. Winchester and Mr. Hyde
-Mr. & Mrs. Who?
-Morale Victory
-Death Takes a Holiday
-Run for the Money
Larry Linville (Frank Burns, 117)
The greatest pure acting performance of the series?
BURNS-A-THON
-Five O'Clock Charlie
-Rainbow Bridge
-Major Fred C. Dobbs
-House Arrest
-Soldier of the Month
-Margaret's Engagement
Wayne Rogers (Trapper John Macintyre, 73)
Focusing on how well M*A*S*H replaced lost characters so seamlessly makes you overlook how easily Alan and Wayne made us forget Donald and Elliot.
TRAPPERTHON
-Requiem for a Lightweight
-Ceasefire
-As You Were
-Bombed
-Bulletin Board
-Check-up
McLean Stevenson (Henry Blake, 70)
The best character on the best sitcom ever.
BLAKE-A-THON
-Sometimes You Hear the Bullet
-The Army-Navy Game
-Cowboy
-Henry, Please Come Home
-The Trial of Henry Blake
-Henry in Love
-Abyssinia, Henry
Allan Arbus (Sydney Freedman, 12)
The highest per-episode rating of any M*A*S*H actor.
SIDNEYTHON
-O.R.
-Quo Vadis, Captain Chandler?
-Dear Sigmund
-War of Nerves
-The Billfold Syndrome
-Bless You Hawkeye
Edward Winter (Col. Flagg, 7)
The second-highest per-episode rating.
FLAGG-A-THON
-Deal Me Out
-A Smattering of Intelligence
-Officer of the Day
-The Abduction of Margaret Houlihan
-Rally Round the Flagg, Boys
-"Trials", AfterMASH
Soon-Tek Oh (5)
The greatest recurring guest star in M*A*S*H history who never played the same role twice. Surgeon, soldier, medic, translator...and no one ever surrendered with more charm.
TEKOHTHON
-Love and Marriage
-The Bus
-The Korean Surgeon
-The Yalu Brick Road
-Foreign Affairs
-"Honor Thy Brother", TALES OF THE GOLD MONKEY
GREATEST GUEST STAR PERFORMANCES
-Virginia Ann Lee, "The Moose"
-Leslie Nielsen, "The Ringbanger"
-Harry Morgan, "The General Flipped at Dawn"
-Blythe Danner, "The More I See You"
-Mariette Hartley, "Inga"
ENSEMBLE-A-THON
-Big Mac
-Deluge
-The Interview
-Point of View
-Life Time
-Our Finest Hour
COMINGS AND GOINGS
It's tempting to think about what might have been, had the original cast stayed together. But...a marathon of the debut and finale episodes of the changing characters might be the most satisfying marathon of all.
-Abyssinia, Henry
-Welcome to Korea
-Change of Command
-Fade Out, Fade In
-Good Bye Radar
FOUR-STAR EPISODES
A four-star movie begat 61 four-star episodes. No other television show comes close.
-season one: 8
-season two: 9
-season three: 11 (by this measure, the greatest single season of serial television ever)
-season four: 9
-season five: 9
-season six: 5
-season seven: 1
-season eight: 5
-season nine: 1
-season ten: 0
-season eleven: 3
PERFORMANCES (# of episodes)
Alan Alda (Benjamin Franklin Pierce, 251)
Who was the most influential creator of the most influential sitcom ever? Larry Gelbart. After that...Burt Metcalfe? Or Alan. He wrote nineteen episodes, directed thirty, and was creative consultant for one hundred thirty-one. All with nary a single Hawkeye-less entry.
HAWK-A-THON
-Yankee Doodle Doctor
-Tuttle
-Dear Dad, Again
-Adam's Ribs
-The Late Captain Pierce
-Hawkeye
-The More I See You
-Hawk's Nightmare
-Inga
-Peace on Us
-Who Knew?
-Goodbye, Farewell, and Amen
Loretta Swit (Margaret Houlihan, 237)
One of the most clearly-rendered character arcs in television history.
HOTLIPS-A-THON
-Hot Lips and Empty Arms
-The Nurses
-Margaret's Marriage
-Comrades in Arms
-Stars and Stripes
-Father's Day
Jamie Farr (Max Klinger, 211)
Early-series Klinger was classic, latter-series Klinger lovely (though occasionally forced). Who wouldn't love an actor who turned "Halt! Who goes there?" into a character for the ages? Think of how the very lifeblood of M*A*S*H would have been diminished had Klinger been portrayed swishily, as originally written?
KLINGERTHON
-Chief Surgeon Who?
-Radar's Report
-Ain't Love Grand
-Too Many Cooks
-Dear Uncle Abdul
-As Time Goes By
William Christopher (Francis Mulcahy, 210)
William created a character so sweetly and understatedly lovable, we forgot to be annoyed that he's a bible-thumper.
MULCAHYTHON
-Alcoholics Unanimous
-Movie Tonight
-Mulcahy's War
-Dear Sis
-Blood Brothers
-Heroes
Harry Morgan (Sherman Potter, 179)
Can anybody calculate how towering it is that every episode from seasons 4-11 didn't end with the viewer thinking about how much they miss Henry?
POTTERTHON
-Change of Command
-Dear Mildred
-Hawkeye Get Your Gun
-Potter's Retirement
-Pressure Points
-Old Soldiers
Mike Farrell (B.J. Hunnicutt, 178)
See the previous actor's note.
B.J.-A-THON
-Welcome to Korea
-B.J. Papa San
-Hanky Panky
-Period of Adjustment
-The Party
-Oh, How We Danced
Gary Burghoff (Radar O'Reilly, 155)
A timeless synthesis of actor and character. Can we please have W*A*L*T*E*R released on dvd? We don't mind if it sucks.
RADAR-A-THON
-Springtime
-The General's Practitioner
-Fallen Idol
-Your Hit Parade
-Lt. Radar O'Reilly
-Mail Call Three
-Hot Lips is Back in Town
-Good-Bye Radar
-The Foresight Saga
-"It Had to be You", AfterMASH
David Ogden Stiers (Charles Emerson Winchester, 131)
Back up a fresh truckload of superlatives, please.
WINCHESTERTHON
-Fade Out, Fade In
-The Winchester Tapes
-Dr. Winchester and Mr. Hyde
-Mr. & Mrs. Who?
-Morale Victory
-Death Takes a Holiday
-Run for the Money
Larry Linville (Frank Burns, 117)
The greatest pure acting performance of the series?
BURNS-A-THON
-Five O'Clock Charlie
-Rainbow Bridge
-Major Fred C. Dobbs
-House Arrest
-Soldier of the Month
-Margaret's Engagement
Wayne Rogers (Trapper John Macintyre, 73)
Focusing on how well M*A*S*H replaced lost characters so seamlessly makes you overlook how easily Alan and Wayne made us forget Donald and Elliot.
TRAPPERTHON
-Requiem for a Lightweight
-Ceasefire
-As You Were
-Bombed
-Bulletin Board
-Check-up
McLean Stevenson (Henry Blake, 70)
The best character on the best sitcom ever.
BLAKE-A-THON
-Sometimes You Hear the Bullet
-The Army-Navy Game
-Cowboy
-Henry, Please Come Home
-The Trial of Henry Blake
-Henry in Love
-Abyssinia, Henry
Allan Arbus (Sydney Freedman, 12)
The highest per-episode rating of any M*A*S*H actor.
SIDNEYTHON
-O.R.
-Quo Vadis, Captain Chandler?
-Dear Sigmund
-War of Nerves
-The Billfold Syndrome
-Bless You Hawkeye
Edward Winter (Col. Flagg, 7)
The second-highest per-episode rating.
FLAGG-A-THON
-Deal Me Out
-A Smattering of Intelligence
-Officer of the Day
-The Abduction of Margaret Houlihan
-Rally Round the Flagg, Boys
-"Trials", AfterMASH
Soon-Tek Oh (5)
The greatest recurring guest star in M*A*S*H history who never played the same role twice. Surgeon, soldier, medic, translator...and no one ever surrendered with more charm.
TEKOHTHON
-Love and Marriage
-The Bus
-The Korean Surgeon
-The Yalu Brick Road
-Foreign Affairs
-"Honor Thy Brother", TALES OF THE GOLD MONKEY
GREATEST GUEST STAR PERFORMANCES
-Virginia Ann Lee, "The Moose"
-Leslie Nielsen, "The Ringbanger"
-Harry Morgan, "The General Flipped at Dawn"
-Blythe Danner, "The More I See You"
-Mariette Hartley, "Inga"
ENSEMBLE-A-THON
-Big Mac
-Deluge
-The Interview
-Point of View
-Life Time
-Our Finest Hour
COMINGS AND GOINGS
It's tempting to think about what might have been, had the original cast stayed together. But...a marathon of the debut and finale episodes of the changing characters might be the most satisfying marathon of all.
-Abyssinia, Henry
-Welcome to Korea
-Change of Command
-Fade Out, Fade In
-Good Bye Radar
Sunday, July 8, 2012
Stargate: Atlantis, season 5
FOUR STAR
-The Shrine
There is a reluctance in me to award any SGA product four stars, as even the best episodes almost never escape the series' primary flaw, the unwillingness or inability of the writers to imbue the characters with genuine depth. However...when these credits rolled, the words that rolled off my lips were "that was great". An episode that feels like nothing you've seen in sci fi (okay, Uhura did revert to a childlike state once, but this resolution is entirely new). Rodney is exposed to an alien parasite that renders him a simpleton. His gradual loss of IQ is painful and poignant, and shows that David Hewlett was capable of much more than the writers gave him. The team takes him to a shrine on a wraith-held planet which supposedly provides one day of complete cure before the patient dies. Dr. Keller provides the most realistic-looking improvised brain surgery you've ever seen.
-First Contact/The Lost Tribe
Absolutely gripping, unpredictable, and breakneck, with stabs of humor for flavor. It's funny that the first title is a lift from STAR TREK, as i'm torn over whether four stars here is as great as a four in TREK. That being said...i couldn't NOT give four, as i don't think the SG people could have blown the doors off any more impressively. I bend over backwards to avoid hyperbole, so bear that in mind when i call this two-parter heart-pounding. Even more surprising, the guest star is SG1's Michael Shanks. He's grown since he first entered the sci fi universe, as a piece of balsa. Jackson arrives at Atlantis with a clue to a secret lab. As soon as he and Rodney discover it, powerful aliens in environment suits appear, taking both them and a piece of technology. The wraith Todd is at a summit with the Daedalus, exploring the feasibility of the DNA treatment that would allow the wraith to no longer feed on humans. On a distant world, Rodney is forced to activate the ancient device, which will destroy any wraith ship that engages hyperdrive...but also explode any stargate being used, with the force of many nukes. Todd commandeers the Daedalus, and is off on a race to the mysterious alien planet. They turn out to be a splinter group of asgard who would let anyone die to be rid of the wraith. Also racing to the planet is Sheppard, hitching on a traveler ship. Ronon and Doc Keller have some great moments as they try to re-take Daedalus. Everything, but everything, works.
NOTEWORTHY
-Broken Ties **
Teyla's return to active duty over being a full-time newborn parent should have come as the result of an experience demonstrating how her actions can affect the lives of millions. Her choice here feels too easy and manufactured.
-The Daedalus Variations ***
Three stars doesn't get any more fun. An empty Daedalus duplicate appears in orbit. As Shepard's team investigates, the ship flashes into a parallel universe. They find another version of their team dead, and realize that the ship's engine design taps into alternate universe energy, but is uncontrollably jumping them from universe to universe. In the next jump, they are attacked by frighteningly powerful aliens. Then they jump near a star going nova. They realize the only way to get home is to re-traverse all the stops they just made.
-Whispers ***
A tale of blind, predator, mutant hybrids who emit a spooky mist. Sheppard and Beckett fight alongside an estrogen-powered team containing Nicole de Boer (DS9), Leela Savasta (BATTLESTAR GALACTICA), and Janina Gavankar (TRUE BLOOD). Perhaps a trifle obvious, but with great chemistry.
-The Prodigal ***
The SGA swan song for Connor Trineer (ENTERPRISE). In nine episodes over four seasons, he was always compelling. Like all SG characters, there was untapped potential, and the writers pissed away the enormous sympathy he entered the series with. But a good arc (including an ending worthy of Nicholson) is nothing to be ashamed of. This episode deftly avoids predictability. Michael's forces take over the Atlantis control tower, leaving everyone powerless and cut off. They all attempt to foil him, but in credibly disjointed ways. At the end, the most humanistic character (Teyla) does the most cold-blooded act ever seen on the show.
-Brain Storm ***
Cheeky, delightful quirkiness. Rodney takes Jennifer to a physics conference on Earth run by an old rival (Dave Foley - KIDS IN THE HALL, NEWSRADIO), who is about to implement a dangerous idea he doesn't realize he stole from Rodney. 100 of the world's top physicists are suddenly trapped in a compound which is about to freeze solid. Foley is understatedly, spot-on funny. Bill Nye and Neil deGrasse Tyson play themselves, plus a credible facsimile of Stephen Hawking rolls by. It almost tips into too silly, but the menace keeps it in line. Jennifer briefly dies, then invites Rodney to join the mile-high club. He doesn't fumble the moment.
-Enemy at the Gate ***
I rolled into this episode with grand hopes, assuming that SGA had intended to finish after five seasons. But no, it was cancelled. For all its limitations in terms of character, the series is a delightful ride. As a finale, this one will leave you wanting more (the romance between Sheppard and Teyla that never happened, a resolution to the wraith problem, and Ford's plot line), but much like the series itself, if you can ignore the flaws, you'll have a sweet ride. They went for the highest octane action they could, and hit the mark. A super-powered wraith ship finds the location of Earth. Another uneasy alliance with wraith Todd (the under-appreciated Christopher Heyerdahl, whose unexpected moment of laughter is the highlight of the show) provides two ZPMs, and the whole city flies into hyperspace in pursuit. A battle above Earth ensues, with Sheppard already aboard the hive in a nuclear suicide mission. Parts of it are a little too easy (Ronon's death scene! No, never mind!), you might long for a little more guest star juice, and wish they'd been able to incorporate something unexpected...but enjoy it, because it's a burner.
-The Shrine
There is a reluctance in me to award any SGA product four stars, as even the best episodes almost never escape the series' primary flaw, the unwillingness or inability of the writers to imbue the characters with genuine depth. However...when these credits rolled, the words that rolled off my lips were "that was great". An episode that feels like nothing you've seen in sci fi (okay, Uhura did revert to a childlike state once, but this resolution is entirely new). Rodney is exposed to an alien parasite that renders him a simpleton. His gradual loss of IQ is painful and poignant, and shows that David Hewlett was capable of much more than the writers gave him. The team takes him to a shrine on a wraith-held planet which supposedly provides one day of complete cure before the patient dies. Dr. Keller provides the most realistic-looking improvised brain surgery you've ever seen.
-First Contact/The Lost Tribe
Absolutely gripping, unpredictable, and breakneck, with stabs of humor for flavor. It's funny that the first title is a lift from STAR TREK, as i'm torn over whether four stars here is as great as a four in TREK. That being said...i couldn't NOT give four, as i don't think the SG people could have blown the doors off any more impressively. I bend over backwards to avoid hyperbole, so bear that in mind when i call this two-parter heart-pounding. Even more surprising, the guest star is SG1's Michael Shanks. He's grown since he first entered the sci fi universe, as a piece of balsa. Jackson arrives at Atlantis with a clue to a secret lab. As soon as he and Rodney discover it, powerful aliens in environment suits appear, taking both them and a piece of technology. The wraith Todd is at a summit with the Daedalus, exploring the feasibility of the DNA treatment that would allow the wraith to no longer feed on humans. On a distant world, Rodney is forced to activate the ancient device, which will destroy any wraith ship that engages hyperdrive...but also explode any stargate being used, with the force of many nukes. Todd commandeers the Daedalus, and is off on a race to the mysterious alien planet. They turn out to be a splinter group of asgard who would let anyone die to be rid of the wraith. Also racing to the planet is Sheppard, hitching on a traveler ship. Ronon and Doc Keller have some great moments as they try to re-take Daedalus. Everything, but everything, works.
NOTEWORTHY
-Broken Ties **
Teyla's return to active duty over being a full-time newborn parent should have come as the result of an experience demonstrating how her actions can affect the lives of millions. Her choice here feels too easy and manufactured.
-The Daedalus Variations ***
Three stars doesn't get any more fun. An empty Daedalus duplicate appears in orbit. As Shepard's team investigates, the ship flashes into a parallel universe. They find another version of their team dead, and realize that the ship's engine design taps into alternate universe energy, but is uncontrollably jumping them from universe to universe. In the next jump, they are attacked by frighteningly powerful aliens. Then they jump near a star going nova. They realize the only way to get home is to re-traverse all the stops they just made.
-Whispers ***
A tale of blind, predator, mutant hybrids who emit a spooky mist. Sheppard and Beckett fight alongside an estrogen-powered team containing Nicole de Boer (DS9), Leela Savasta (BATTLESTAR GALACTICA), and Janina Gavankar (TRUE BLOOD). Perhaps a trifle obvious, but with great chemistry.
-The Prodigal ***
The SGA swan song for Connor Trineer (ENTERPRISE). In nine episodes over four seasons, he was always compelling. Like all SG characters, there was untapped potential, and the writers pissed away the enormous sympathy he entered the series with. But a good arc (including an ending worthy of Nicholson) is nothing to be ashamed of. This episode deftly avoids predictability. Michael's forces take over the Atlantis control tower, leaving everyone powerless and cut off. They all attempt to foil him, but in credibly disjointed ways. At the end, the most humanistic character (Teyla) does the most cold-blooded act ever seen on the show.
-Brain Storm ***
Cheeky, delightful quirkiness. Rodney takes Jennifer to a physics conference on Earth run by an old rival (Dave Foley - KIDS IN THE HALL, NEWSRADIO), who is about to implement a dangerous idea he doesn't realize he stole from Rodney. 100 of the world's top physicists are suddenly trapped in a compound which is about to freeze solid. Foley is understatedly, spot-on funny. Bill Nye and Neil deGrasse Tyson play themselves, plus a credible facsimile of Stephen Hawking rolls by. It almost tips into too silly, but the menace keeps it in line. Jennifer briefly dies, then invites Rodney to join the mile-high club. He doesn't fumble the moment.
-Enemy at the Gate ***
I rolled into this episode with grand hopes, assuming that SGA had intended to finish after five seasons. But no, it was cancelled. For all its limitations in terms of character, the series is a delightful ride. As a finale, this one will leave you wanting more (the romance between Sheppard and Teyla that never happened, a resolution to the wraith problem, and Ford's plot line), but much like the series itself, if you can ignore the flaws, you'll have a sweet ride. They went for the highest octane action they could, and hit the mark. A super-powered wraith ship finds the location of Earth. Another uneasy alliance with wraith Todd (the under-appreciated Christopher Heyerdahl, whose unexpected moment of laughter is the highlight of the show) provides two ZPMs, and the whole city flies into hyperspace in pursuit. A battle above Earth ensues, with Sheppard already aboard the hive in a nuclear suicide mission. Parts of it are a little too easy (Ronon's death scene! No, never mind!), you might long for a little more guest star juice, and wish they'd been able to incorporate something unexpected...but enjoy it, because it's a burner.
Friday, July 6, 2012
boris, bela, or vincent?
THE GREATEST HORROR ACTOR OF ALL TIME
Isn't it revealing that there isn't a single credible female candidate? It turns out there's a genre in which women have made even less inroads than comedy. What does that say about our society? Somebody write a thesis!
Of course, the idea of treating art as competition is ludicrous. But who's the spookiest of the spooky? Here's the point system:
5 points - originating a major classic horror role
3 points - sequel to a major classic horror role by same actor
2 points - TV series for a major classic horror role by same actor
2 points - originating a minor classic horror role
1 point - sequel to a minor classic horror role by same actor
1 point - classic horror role originated by another
1 point - notable miscellaneous horror role
1 point - supplemental X factor
LON CHANEY
Classic roles:
THE PHANTOM OF THE OPERA = 5 points
THE HUNCHBACK OF NOTRE DAME = 5 points
total: 10 points
But for dying young, the man of a thousand faces might have been the hands-down champion. Only one of his films was a talkie...and voice is perhaps the greatest tool of a horror actor.
CHRISTOPHER LEE
Classic roles:
-Dracula (10x) = 10 points
-Frankenstein's creature (1x) = 1 point
-mummy (1x) = 1 point
-Fu Manchu (5x) = 5 points
total: 17 points
Sunk by the fact that his signature role was signed off on by Bela twenty-seven years before.
ROBERT ENGLUND
Classic role:
A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET (seven films and one series) = 5+3+3+3+3+3+3+2
= 25 points
divided by 50% for genre mixing
total: 13 points
Great chops, but cannot be taken seriously because ELM STREET is a horror/slasher hybrid. Slasher is a different genre, with different psychological motivations and functions. A movie about slasher films might be horror, but they themselves are not.
LON CHANEY, JR.
Classic roles:
-THE WOLF MAN (5x) = 5+3+3+3+3 = 17 points
-Frankenstein's creature (1x) = 1 point
-mummy (3x) = 3 points
-Dracula (1x) = 1 points
x factor = 1 point
total: 23 points
Played his iconic role more times than any of the big four. He also played a mummy werewolf. Yup.
BELA LUGOSI
Classic role:
-DRACULA (2x, plus two other vampires) = 5+3+1+1 = 10 points
-THE BLACK CAT = 2 points
-THE RAVEN = 2 points
-Ygor (2x) = 3 points
-Frankenstein's creature (1x) = 1 points
x factor = 1 point
total: 19 points
Has there ever been a more iconic, imitated horror performance? He also infected Lon, Jr. in THE WOLF MAN.
VINCENT PRICE
Classic roles:
-HOUSE OF WAX = 2 points
-THE FLY (2x) = 3 points
-HOUSE OF USHER = 2 points
-PIT AND THE PENDULUM = 2 points
-invisible man (2x) = 2 points
-DR. PHIBES (2x) = 3 points
x factor = 5 points
total: 19 points
Copious supplemental juice for appearances in the classic BATMAN (as Egghead), THE BRADY BUNCH, THE MUPPET SHOW, EDWARD SCISSORHANDS, and the greatest music video of all time.
BORIS KARLOFF
Classic roles:
-FRANKENSTEIN (3x) = 5+3+3 = 11 points
-THE MASK OF FU MANCHU = 2 points
-THE MUMMY = 5 points
-THE BLACK CAT = 2 points
-THE RAVEN = 2 points
-Dr. Frankenstein (1x) = 1 point
x factor = 4 points
total: 27 points
Also played a mad scientist in one of the FRANKENSTEIN sequels. He was the only one of the classic titans (with Bela and Lon) to turn down BUD ABBOTT AND LOU COSTELLO MEET FRANKENSTEIN, which could have been the only film to unite them all in their iconic roles. Integrity? Perhaps...or maybe ego, as he later did ABBOTT AND COSTELLO MEET THE KILLER, BORIS KARLOFF and ABBOTT AND COSTELLO MEET DR. JEKYLL AND MR. HYDE. But he's two of the big four, and as the voice of the Grinch, immortality doesn't beckon any louder.
=====
So there they are. Lon, Robert, Christopher, Bela and Vincent together in the third spot, Lon Jr., and Boris. Never mind your protests, Price fans. Now imagine you're the host of a dinner party, and these are your seven guests. Can we have our site painter get to work on that portrait? It would be even creepier with them in street clothes, wouldn't it? Sweetly spooky dreams to all...
Isn't it revealing that there isn't a single credible female candidate? It turns out there's a genre in which women have made even less inroads than comedy. What does that say about our society? Somebody write a thesis!
Of course, the idea of treating art as competition is ludicrous. But who's the spookiest of the spooky? Here's the point system:
5 points - originating a major classic horror role
3 points - sequel to a major classic horror role by same actor
2 points - TV series for a major classic horror role by same actor
2 points - originating a minor classic horror role
1 point - sequel to a minor classic horror role by same actor
1 point - classic horror role originated by another
1 point - notable miscellaneous horror role
1 point - supplemental X factor
LON CHANEY
Classic roles:
THE PHANTOM OF THE OPERA = 5 points
THE HUNCHBACK OF NOTRE DAME = 5 points
total: 10 points
But for dying young, the man of a thousand faces might have been the hands-down champion. Only one of his films was a talkie...and voice is perhaps the greatest tool of a horror actor.
CHRISTOPHER LEE
Classic roles:
-Dracula (10x) = 10 points
-Frankenstein's creature (1x) = 1 point
-mummy (1x) = 1 point
-Fu Manchu (5x) = 5 points
total: 17 points
Sunk by the fact that his signature role was signed off on by Bela twenty-seven years before.
ROBERT ENGLUND
Classic role:
A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET (seven films and one series) = 5+3+3+3+3+3+3+2
= 25 points
divided by 50% for genre mixing
total: 13 points
Great chops, but cannot be taken seriously because ELM STREET is a horror/slasher hybrid. Slasher is a different genre, with different psychological motivations and functions. A movie about slasher films might be horror, but they themselves are not.
LON CHANEY, JR.
Classic roles:
-THE WOLF MAN (5x) = 5+3+3+3+3 = 17 points
-Frankenstein's creature (1x) = 1 point
-mummy (3x) = 3 points
-Dracula (1x) = 1 points
x factor = 1 point
total: 23 points
Played his iconic role more times than any of the big four. He also played a mummy werewolf. Yup.
BELA LUGOSI
Classic role:
-DRACULA (2x, plus two other vampires) = 5+3+1+1 = 10 points
-THE BLACK CAT = 2 points
-THE RAVEN = 2 points
-Ygor (2x) = 3 points
-Frankenstein's creature (1x) = 1 points
x factor = 1 point
total: 19 points
Has there ever been a more iconic, imitated horror performance? He also infected Lon, Jr. in THE WOLF MAN.
VINCENT PRICE
Classic roles:
-HOUSE OF WAX = 2 points
-THE FLY (2x) = 3 points
-HOUSE OF USHER = 2 points
-PIT AND THE PENDULUM = 2 points
-invisible man (2x) = 2 points
-DR. PHIBES (2x) = 3 points
x factor = 5 points
total: 19 points
Copious supplemental juice for appearances in the classic BATMAN (as Egghead), THE BRADY BUNCH, THE MUPPET SHOW, EDWARD SCISSORHANDS, and the greatest music video of all time.
BORIS KARLOFF
Classic roles:
-FRANKENSTEIN (3x) = 5+3+3 = 11 points
-THE MASK OF FU MANCHU = 2 points
-THE MUMMY = 5 points
-THE BLACK CAT = 2 points
-THE RAVEN = 2 points
-Dr. Frankenstein (1x) = 1 point
x factor = 4 points
total: 27 points
Also played a mad scientist in one of the FRANKENSTEIN sequels. He was the only one of the classic titans (with Bela and Lon) to turn down BUD ABBOTT AND LOU COSTELLO MEET FRANKENSTEIN, which could have been the only film to unite them all in their iconic roles. Integrity? Perhaps...or maybe ego, as he later did ABBOTT AND COSTELLO MEET THE KILLER, BORIS KARLOFF and ABBOTT AND COSTELLO MEET DR. JEKYLL AND MR. HYDE. But he's two of the big four, and as the voice of the Grinch, immortality doesn't beckon any louder.
=====
So there they are. Lon, Robert, Christopher, Bela and Vincent together in the third spot, Lon Jr., and Boris. Never mind your protests, Price fans. Now imagine you're the host of a dinner party, and these are your seven guests. Can we have our site painter get to work on that portrait? It would be even creepier with them in street clothes, wouldn't it? Sweetly spooky dreams to all...
Thursday, July 5, 2012
M*A*S*H, season 11
FOUR STAR
-Foreign Affairs
Just when you thought that M*A*S*H had nothing left to say, Charles falls for a french Red Cross ambassador. He shuts down a touching romance, when he decides she is too bohemian. No happy ending, no lesson learned. How miserably human. The B plot almost rises to the same level, as a soulless P.R. major (Jeffrey Tambor[!] - THE LARRY SANDERS SHOW, ARRESTED DEVELOPMENT) wants to make a hero out of an enemy pilot who (accidentally) delivered a high-tech plane to the americans. Hawk and BJ connive to replace the pilot with the translator (the infinitely-delightful Soon-Tek Oh in his final 4077 go-around) who actually wants to go to America.
-Who Knew?
Hawkeye has a fling with a nurse who is killed by a landmine. He realizes that nobody really knew her, least of all himself. He is forced to take a hard look at his own emotional standoffishness. The eulogy he delivers is one of Alan's most moving moments in the show's history. The fine B plot has Klinger trying to convince Winchester that hula hoops and frisbees would be good investments. Directed by Harry Morgan.
-Goodbye, Farewell, and Amen
If this isn't the most exquisite series finale of all time, i wish to know what is. Is it possible for me to overstate the sweeping, monumental brilliance? Yes, but i did quite well on my verbal SATs. Suffice to say that if every fan who ever loved this show were to have imagined the most perfect swan song, it's doubtful that many of those flights of fancy would have even come close to this. Tears, laughter, and everything in between. It starts and ends with Alan, who co-wrote and directed. They gave everyone memorable, perfect moments...but Hawkeye's storyline, which starts with him in a sanatorium after a nervous breakdown, is a stark, towering performance that, in a sense, was the only way to end his arc. In a way that perhaps the writers never even intended, it also makes a laser-sharp point about mental health. Earlier in the series, Sydney called Hawkeye the "sanest person" he'd ever me. If you think a mental breakdown during war isn't consistent with that, you don't understand sanity. Alan and Allan's scenes are searing. Hawkeye is ultimately sent back to camp. In the O.R., we hear armed forces radio announce the end of the war. It's indescribably moving. Mulcahy loses his hearing. Klinger stays in Korea, to help Soon-Lee find her parents. Winchester finds himself trying to teach a group of P.O.W.s about Mozart...only to see them killed after they finally get it right. And the mess tent farewells...you would think there's no way they could avoid being indulgent, with how long it goes on. But it's not. As the credits rolled, i stood in silence and clapped.
NOTEWORTHY
-Trick or Treatment ***
George Wendt! Andrew (no Dice) Clay!
-Run for the Money ***
A passable tale of a running scam pitting Mulcahy against the 8063rd's best, lifted up by a poignant gem of a B plot. Winchester defends a stuttering soldier, and tries to convince him he's not dumb. His behavior is curious, until the final shot reveals that his beloved sister at home is a stutterer.
-U.N., the Night and the Music ***
Not all flawless episodes are four stars. Some are merely delightful. Three U.N. delegates make a lasting impression. An Indian turns Potter and Klinger upside down. An impotent Swede falls into Margaret's arms. And an unctuous Brit outsnobs Charles, only to reveal that he's the son of a butler. Purely charming.
-Strange Bedfellows **
Potter's son-in-law (Dennis Dugan - Captain Freedom, HILL STREET BLUES) visits, and Sherm finds out he had an affair in Tokyo. Oh the angst, oh the hand-wringing! It's maudlin, embarrassing, and childish (not the affair, our society's obsession with soul-destroying monogamy), and only saved by the revelation that Potter had a similar affair when he was young.
-Say No More ***
It's fascinating to contrast this episode with numerous other M*A*S*H treatments of high-ranking officers insensitized to the killing they oversee. An abrasive general (John Anderson, PSYCHO) sets up a temporary base of command while his son is recovering from injuries. The son dies. There's no attempt to turn the general into a caricature, no crazy scheme whereby wacky doctors outwit said general. He and Hawkeye have an unexpectedly poignant and strikingly real conversation when Hawk delivers the news. Then of course, the general goes back to work. Ultimately there's the sense of something missing...but it was a hell of a try.
-Give and Take *
If you're ever trying to make someone understand that M*A*S*H could be saccharinly cringe-worthy, here's a nice exhibit A.
-As Time Goes By ***
A somewhat meandering penultimate episode, but sweet. Margaret prepares a camp time capsule, and Hawkeye lobbies to have less "proper" items included. The debut of Soon-Lee (Rosalind Chao - THE JOY LUCK CLUB, STAR TREK, AFTER MASH). They bury Radar's teddy bear.
-Foreign Affairs
Just when you thought that M*A*S*H had nothing left to say, Charles falls for a french Red Cross ambassador. He shuts down a touching romance, when he decides she is too bohemian. No happy ending, no lesson learned. How miserably human. The B plot almost rises to the same level, as a soulless P.R. major (Jeffrey Tambor[!] - THE LARRY SANDERS SHOW, ARRESTED DEVELOPMENT) wants to make a hero out of an enemy pilot who (accidentally) delivered a high-tech plane to the americans. Hawk and BJ connive to replace the pilot with the translator (the infinitely-delightful Soon-Tek Oh in his final 4077 go-around) who actually wants to go to America.
-Who Knew?
Hawkeye has a fling with a nurse who is killed by a landmine. He realizes that nobody really knew her, least of all himself. He is forced to take a hard look at his own emotional standoffishness. The eulogy he delivers is one of Alan's most moving moments in the show's history. The fine B plot has Klinger trying to convince Winchester that hula hoops and frisbees would be good investments. Directed by Harry Morgan.
-Goodbye, Farewell, and Amen
If this isn't the most exquisite series finale of all time, i wish to know what is. Is it possible for me to overstate the sweeping, monumental brilliance? Yes, but i did quite well on my verbal SATs. Suffice to say that if every fan who ever loved this show were to have imagined the most perfect swan song, it's doubtful that many of those flights of fancy would have even come close to this. Tears, laughter, and everything in between. It starts and ends with Alan, who co-wrote and directed. They gave everyone memorable, perfect moments...but Hawkeye's storyline, which starts with him in a sanatorium after a nervous breakdown, is a stark, towering performance that, in a sense, was the only way to end his arc. In a way that perhaps the writers never even intended, it also makes a laser-sharp point about mental health. Earlier in the series, Sydney called Hawkeye the "sanest person" he'd ever me. If you think a mental breakdown during war isn't consistent with that, you don't understand sanity. Alan and Allan's scenes are searing. Hawkeye is ultimately sent back to camp. In the O.R., we hear armed forces radio announce the end of the war. It's indescribably moving. Mulcahy loses his hearing. Klinger stays in Korea, to help Soon-Lee find her parents. Winchester finds himself trying to teach a group of P.O.W.s about Mozart...only to see them killed after they finally get it right. And the mess tent farewells...you would think there's no way they could avoid being indulgent, with how long it goes on. But it's not. As the credits rolled, i stood in silence and clapped.
NOTEWORTHY
-Trick or Treatment ***
George Wendt! Andrew (no Dice) Clay!
-Run for the Money ***
A passable tale of a running scam pitting Mulcahy against the 8063rd's best, lifted up by a poignant gem of a B plot. Winchester defends a stuttering soldier, and tries to convince him he's not dumb. His behavior is curious, until the final shot reveals that his beloved sister at home is a stutterer.
-U.N., the Night and the Music ***
Not all flawless episodes are four stars. Some are merely delightful. Three U.N. delegates make a lasting impression. An Indian turns Potter and Klinger upside down. An impotent Swede falls into Margaret's arms. And an unctuous Brit outsnobs Charles, only to reveal that he's the son of a butler. Purely charming.
-Strange Bedfellows **
Potter's son-in-law (Dennis Dugan - Captain Freedom, HILL STREET BLUES) visits, and Sherm finds out he had an affair in Tokyo. Oh the angst, oh the hand-wringing! It's maudlin, embarrassing, and childish (not the affair, our society's obsession with soul-destroying monogamy), and only saved by the revelation that Potter had a similar affair when he was young.
-Say No More ***
It's fascinating to contrast this episode with numerous other M*A*S*H treatments of high-ranking officers insensitized to the killing they oversee. An abrasive general (John Anderson, PSYCHO) sets up a temporary base of command while his son is recovering from injuries. The son dies. There's no attempt to turn the general into a caricature, no crazy scheme whereby wacky doctors outwit said general. He and Hawkeye have an unexpectedly poignant and strikingly real conversation when Hawk delivers the news. Then of course, the general goes back to work. Ultimately there's the sense of something missing...but it was a hell of a try.
-Give and Take *
If you're ever trying to make someone understand that M*A*S*H could be saccharinly cringe-worthy, here's a nice exhibit A.
-As Time Goes By ***
A somewhat meandering penultimate episode, but sweet. Margaret prepares a camp time capsule, and Hawkeye lobbies to have less "proper" items included. The debut of Soon-Lee (Rosalind Chao - THE JOY LUCK CLUB, STAR TREK, AFTER MASH). They bury Radar's teddy bear.
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